Escape to Paradise: Stunning Orange Apartment in Puerto del Rosario!
Escape to Paradise: Honestly, is it REALLY Stunning? (Puerto del Rosario, Here We Come!)
Alright, alright, let's get real about "Escape to Paradise: Stunning Orange Apartment in Puerto del Rosario." Because let's be honest, "stunning" gets thrown around like confetti at a bad wedding. I've stayed in places that promised paradise and delivered… well, a slightly damp room with a view of a dumpster. So, I went in skeptical, armed with my travel-sized Purell, a healthy dose of cynicism, and a whole lotta hope.
First off, the name itself is a tease. Orange? Seriously? Is it going to be like living in a giant, slightly sticky, citrus fruit? Turns out, the orange is more of a cheerful, sun-drenched hue, and thank goodness for that.
Accessibility & Safety: The Good Stuff! (And the Hopefully-More-Good-er!)
Okay, let's get the important stuff outta the way first. This is crucial. Accessibility: They say they have facilities for disabled guests. I didn't personally experience it, but I hope it's not just a slightly wider door and a sympathetic smile. Important Note: I'd reach out before booking just to confirm everything is exactly as you need it.
Cleanliness and Safety: This is where they REALLY shine. The anti-viral cleaning products thing is a HUGE relief. And the daily disinfection in common areas, plus the room sanitization between stays, had me breathing a little easier. They even have hand sanitizer everywhere (essential!), and the staff is apparently trained in safety protocol. They even allow safe dining. The daily disinfection in common areas and the fact they removed shared stationery. The fact they are using professional-grade sanitizing services is good to know. First aid kit, doctor/nurse on call, hot water linen and laundry washing are all good. And those smoke alarms? Yes, please! Fire extinguisher, of course. Frankly makes you feel like they actually care, right?
They even offer a cashless payment service and have a sanitized kitchen and tableware items. They’ve taken it to another level. Hygiene certification is important. Individually wrapped food options are also provided. So, this aspect of the stay is handled with care.
Internet? Oh, The Internet… (Thank Goodness!)
Okay, internet access is no joke when you're trying to pretend you're working while sipping a questionable cocktail by the pool. Good news! Free Wi-Fi in all rooms! HOORAY! And not just in the rooms, but they have Wi-Fi in public areas too! They also have Internet [LAN]. This is very important if you have to watch that movie.
Dining, Drinking, and Snacking: Fueling the Escape!
Alright, a bar and restaurants? Score! Let's dive in:
- Breakfast [buffet]: Always a winner. I love a good buffet.
- Breakfast service: Always a winner.
- A la carte in restaurant: I have always wanted to try this.
- Buffet in restaurant: I love this too.
- Coffee/tea in restaurant and Coffee shop: Essential, people. Essential.
- Happy hour: They have it. Let's do it.
- Poolside bar: Yes, please. I'll take a questionable cocktail, hold the judgement.
- Snack bar: For those moments when you've run out of willpower and desperately need a churro.
- Room service [24-hour]: Because midnight cravings are real.
Things to Do, Ways to Relax (and Possibly Get Sunburned):
This is where "Escape to Paradise" gets interesting.
- Swimming pool [outdoor]: The most important thing.
- Massage: Okay, yes, please. I'm already picturing myself.
- Spa/sauna: Let me see if I will try this. Maybe?
Services and Conveniences: Making Life Easier (Thank Goodness!)
- Concierge: Always welcome, especially when you can't figure out how to ask where the nearest bodega is in broken Spanish.
- Daily housekeeping: Praise be!
- Elevator: HUGE win. My knees are thanking them already.
- Luggage storage: Because who wants to wrestle their suitcase the entire time?
- Front desk [24-hour]: Very very important to note.
- Gift/souvenir shop: Good for emergency presents and "I forgot to buy something" panic.
- Laundry service and dry cleaning: Also important
Available in All Rooms: The Necessities (and a Few Niceties!)
Let's talk about the actual room, shall we?
- Air conditioning: Crucial. Seriously.
- Alarm clock: Because even on vacation, you gotta get outta bed eventually.
- Blackout curtains: Essential for sleeping off questionable cocktails.
- Bathrobes, slippers, and bathrobes: Makes me feel like a celebrity.
- Coffee/tea maker: Because morning is a cruel mistress.
- Free bottled water: Hydration is key.
- Hair dryer: Thank the heavens.
- In-room safe box: For stashing away… well, your passport and the emergency stash of chocolate you swore you wouldn't eat.
- Internet access - wireless: Yessss.
- Mini bar: For those times when you really shouldn't, but absolutely must, have a tiny bottle of something.
- Private bathroom: Obvious, but important.
- Refrigerator: Essential for keeping those beers cold.
- Shower, bathtub
- TV:
The Rambling, Honest, and Absolutely Human Part:
Okay, so "stunning" is subjective. Is it going to be a five-star, marble-floored, caviar-every-morning kind of paradise? Maybe not. But the emphasis on cleanliness, the solid amenities list, and that promise of a pool and a drink? That's enough to pique my interest.
My Quirky Observation
- They have a shrine. I'm not religious, but I'm curious. Is it for good vibes? Is it for lost socks? Now I'm thinking.
The "Almost Missed It But Still Important" Department:
- Car park [free of charge] and car park [on-site] are good.
- Air conditioning in public area YES!
- Foreign exchange
- Facilities for disabled guests
Final Verdict (and a Hook to Get You Booking!):
Look, "Escape to Paradise" isn't promising perfection. It's promising a getaway that seems to be geared towards a good time. It does seem to be safe. And the fact it even offers family/child friendly, babysitting service, and kids facilities is a win!
Here's the deal, folks: If you're looking for a clean, well-equipped basecamp in Puerto del Rosario with a pool and the chance to unwind, book it!
Here's the Hook to get you booking:
"Escape to Paradise: Your Stress-Free Getaway Awaits! Book NOW and receive a FREE welcome cocktail at the poolside bar! Plus, we are running a special on our massage services!"
Disclaimer: I am a human with opinions. This isn't a scientifically objective review, but I hope it's helpful and a little entertaining. Prices and availability are subject to change, and I haven't personally verified every single detail. But hey, book that trip!
Escape to Paradise: Your Dream Seagrass Retreat Awaits in Nieuwvliet!
Alright, buckle up, buttercups, because this ain't your grandma's meticulously planned travel itinerary. We're talking Puerto Rosario, a terrace, and the glorious, unpredictable chaos of my own internal monologue. Prepare for feels, folks. Prepare for tangents. Prepare for the absolute truth: I'm winging this and praying for the best.
Day 1: Arrival, Anxiety, and Amazing Bocadillos
Morning (ish): Landed at Fuerteventura Airport. Okay, first hurdle: baggage claim. Praying for a smooth transition. The last time I flew, my suitcase ended up in Oslo. Oslo! I don't even like lutefisk. Anyway, managed to survive the airport. Found the rental car, which, bless its heart, is smaller than my bathroom. I'm already imagining trying to parallel park in this thing.
Afternoon: Found the Orange Apartment. HOLY MOLY, the terrace! I could live out here. Sunshine, a hint of the ocean, a perfect spot to… get horribly sunburnt. Seriously, I'm as white as a ghost. Must. Not. Forget. Sunscreen. Unpacked, which basically involved throwing everything everywhere. I'm convinced my organization skills peaked in kindergarten. The apartment is lovely, though, and the view from the terrace is to die for.
Late Afternoon/Early Evening: The search for sustenance BEGINS. Wandered the streets of Puerto del Rosario, feeling like a bewildered tourist. Found a little bar, Bar Las Brasas, that was bustling with locals. Ordered a bocadillo - ham and cheese - and a caña (small beer). The bocadillo, my friends, was divine. Simple, perfect, and the kind of thing that makes you think maybe, just maybe, life is alright. The sheer joy of that bocadillo momentarily erased all my pre-trip anxieties. I should get a second one… or three.
Evening: Walked along the harbor. The sunset was an explosion of color. Took a million photos, because, you know, Instagram. Ended up rambling way too long and now I am thinking about my ex… why'd he break up with me? Is it my breath? I need to stop and go back and just… find another bite and drink a glass of wine. I'll feel better in the morning. Or maybe a sangria? I should have taken a nap…
Day 2: Beach Bumming (and Brutal Sunburn)
Morning: Vowed to get up early and be productive. Failed miserably. Slept in. Blame the jet lag. Blame the sangria. Eventually, dragged myself out of bed and, armed with copious amounts of sunscreen, headed to Playa Chica. A small beach right near the apartment, perfect for a newbie like me. The water was crystal clear, the sand was blinding white. This is what paradise is supposed to feel like, right?
Afternoon: Spent way too long in the sun. The sunscreen clearly didn't do its job (or I didn't apply enough. Guilty). Now I'm sporting a lobster-esque hue. Ouch. Ouch. Ouch. Needed an aloe vera emergency. Should have listened to my mom!
Late Afternoon: Found a tiny pharmacy and bought a gallon of aloe vera gel. Currently slathered in it, resembling a slightly less appetizing swamp creature. Watched the sunset from my terrace, contemplating the meaning of life and the utter stupidity of sunburn. Decided the meaning of life is probably a good bocadillo.
Evening (and a bit beyond): Dinner at a little restaurant near the harbor. Had some grilled fish – it was good, but my mouth kinda just craves a taste of the boca-dilos once again. I think I'm addicted. I'm contemplating sneaking out in the middle of the night to go get one. The waiter was super charming, which, naturally, made me feel self-conscious and awkward. That's my superpower. Then, as I was thinking of going back to the apartment, the same thought crossed me and it was just what I needed to hear to finally go to bed.
Day 3: Corralejo Chaos (and the Desert!)
Morning: Big decision: Driving to Corralejo, about an hour north. The plan: see the famous dunes, walk on the beach, and maybe even swim (if I can get over the whole ‘getting my hair wet’ thing). But first! Coffee. And perhaps a third bocadillo for breakfast.
Mid-Morning: The drive was beautiful - mostly. Got slightly lost, which is practically a given for me. Eventually found my way to Corralejo. The dunes were incredible – vast, golden, like something out of a movie. Strolled around feeling unbelievably self-indulgent, I took a million pictures. It’s amazing how much walking can make you realize you REALLY need to pee!
Afternoon: Beach time in Corralejo. The water was a stunning turquoise, and there were a few kite surfers doing amazing tricks. I attempted to look cool and relaxed. Failed. Miserably. I'm more of a 'sit and watch other people be awesome' type of person.
Late Afternoon: Drove back to Puerto Rosario, buzzing from the day, and so tired. I swear my feet are killing me.
Evening and into the Void: Dinner at a place offering tapas. I over-ordered, naturally. Had too much wine. Laughed too loud. Possibly embarrassed myself by getting overly friendly with the waitress. Decided to go back to Bar Las Brazas. Had another bocadillo. This is, officially, my food obsession. Watched the stars on the terrace. Realized, amidst the wine-induced blurriness and the happy tummy, that maybe, just maybe, I'm starting to relax. Maybe this whole "vacation" thing isn't so scary after all. Maybe I'll be back tomorrow morning for a bocadillo… and probably a coffee.
Day 4: The Search for Serenity (and the Quest for the Perfect Bocadillo)
Morning: The day started with a desperate search: I REALLY wanted another bocadillo. I may not have been able to get over the urge to not have one at Bar Las Brasas. I will go back.
Afternoon: Explored the area around the apartment. Tried to find a local craft market. Got hopelessly lost instead, ended up in some random alley. Tried to remain calm, but I was also starting to feel a little hungry.
Evening: Reached the point of no return. I am now full on food obsessed and I can't stop thinking about the bocadillos! I am going to have to try and make one back home!
Day 5: Departure Blues (or, The Last Bocadillo?)
- Morning: Woke up with a sense of dread. Packing is my least favorite activity. Dragged myself through the process, which involved rummaging through a giant pile of clothes, trying to remember what I'd actually done on this trip.
- Afternoon: One last walk along the harbor. One last longing look at the terrace. And, of necessity… One last bocadillo. It tasted better than ever. Probably because it was the last one.
- Evening: Airport. Security. The long flight home. Contemplating the memory of the bocadillos. And the beach. And the crazy sunsets. And the sun burn. And the fact that, despite the chaos, I actually had a pretty amazing time. I'll be back. And next time, I'm bringing an extra suitcase for the bocadillos… and maybe, just maybe, a bigger car. And more sunscreen.
Okay, so… is this "Escape to Paradise" *actually* paradise, or just like, a beige room with a balcony?
Alright, let's be real. "Paradise" is a pretty big word, isn't it? I went in thinking it would be all sunsets and champagne flutes on the beach. And… well, the orange apartment *is* stunning. Seriously, that orange. Like, "I should paint my entire life this color" orange. It's way better than a beige room. Way. The balcony? HUGE. You can actually *move* on it. Unlike some shoebox-sized balconies I've endured.
So, paradise? Close-ish. It really depends on your definition. If your paradise involves, say, a slightly dodgy Wi-Fi connection that cuts out mid-important video call (guilty!), then maybe not. If it involves waking up to the sun streaming in, that killer orange, and the promise of fresh seafood… yeah, maybe a little bit of paradise *is* involved. I mean, I spent a solid hour just *staring* at that color the first morning.
Side note: The water pressure in the shower is fantastic. That’s HUGE for me. Big. Like, "finally, I can wash all the travel grime off" big.
Tell me about the location. Puerto del Rosario… is it, like, near anything interesting? Or am I going to wander around lost for a week?
Okay, location. Here's the deal. Puerto del Rosario isn't exactly a bustling metropolis. It’s not like, Rome. Or Paris. Or even a particularly exciting McDonald's. But! It's got a certain charm, and it's fantastically well-placed if you want to explore Fuerteventura. The apartment itself is pretty central. Walkable. Kind of.
I may have gotten lost the first day. Twice. But that was mostly because I was too busy gawking at the architecture and trying (and failing) to understand the Spanish street signs. (My Spanish is… enthusiastic, let's say.) There are shops, restaurants, the harbor… you can get around. And if you rent a car (which you totally should), you're golden.
Seriously, rent a car. We drove up to the dunes at Corralejo, and the experience almost sent me to outer space. Absolutely worth the extra euros to explore the island. Don't just stay in the apartment; get out there and find some real adventure. (Even if it's just trying to pronounce "Guincho" correctly, I still haven't gotten that down.)
The pictures look amazing, but is it *actually* clean? Because I'm a bit of a clean freak. (Don't judge.)
Alright, clean freak friend, I hear you. I AM you, honestly. The pictures *do* look amazing, right? And yes, the apartment was remarkably clean. Like, I actually inspected the corners (judge me all you want!). I found… nothing. No dust bunnies engaged in an epic lifecycle, no suspicious stains, nothing.
The kitchen looked like it hadn't cooked a meal in… well, it looked pristine. The bathroom? Sparkling. I'm pretty sure I could have eaten off the floor (but I didn't, because, you know, common sense). They definitely take cleanliness seriously. That said? You know how it is with perfection... After a few days, I did accidentally knock a glass of water over, it wasn't a big deal, but it did happen... And I'm pretty sure I left a small hair in the bathroom during checkout...
So, in short? Yes. It's clean. Really clean. Chill out and enjoy it, and don't spend your entire vacation inspecting every surface like I did. (Oops.)
Anything I should bring that isn't included? Like, are there coffee filters? Or, you know, a survival kit?
Okay, packing advice time. Coffee filters? Probably not. Check beforehand. I'm a caffeine addict—I couldn't live without my morning coffee! I actually brought my own reusable filter, just to be safe. (Prepare for the possibility of instant coffee. It's a thing.)
Survival kit… depends on your definition of survival. I'd recommend sunscreen (duh), a hat, and maybe some insect repellent. There are some cute little shops around that sell these, but you'll often find the ones aimed at tourists sell them at a slightly inflated rate. Don't forget that converter for your electronic devices, it's a must. Also maybe pack some earplugs! If you're a light sleeper, the city noise can be a little… lively. And the seagulls! Those things are relentless.
Also! Bring your own beach towel! I regretted not bringing a beach towel. The one provided was okay, but, you know, I am a creature of comfort. So I did a lot of lying in the sun on my bath towel, which wasn't ideal. So, beach towels - bring them.
What was the *best* thing about staying there? And the worst? Dish the dirt!
Okay, for the *best* thing… oh, that freaking orange. Seriously. It just made me happy. And the balcony! That balcony was my sanctuary. Morning coffee, evening wine, star-gazing sessions… pure bliss. I'm not even kidding when I say that I spent one entire afternoon just *sitting* on the balcony, reading and watching the world go by.
The *worst* thing… Ugh, the Wi-Fi. It was a bit spotty at times. And honestly, the seagulls *never* shut up. They're seriously persistent. I swear they were plotting a heist. I'm sure the apartment's owner would fix their wifi though – they're lovely, truly.
But, you know, even with the tiny imperfections, the experience was amazing and you can’t find better views. Seriously, book it. Just… bring your own coffee filters.
Oh, and the *absolute funniest thing* that happened? I’ll give you a sneak peek: It involved a rogue shopping cart, and a very unfortunate encounter with a parking meter. (It wasn’t me, I swear!). That’s what memories are made of, right?
